Feeling hot and sweaty, could do with a machete
My whereabouts? I haven’t got a clue.
I need to find a clearing but the track’s fast disappearing
No GPS, I’m in a mess. I’m lost in deepest Kew
I should confide, I’ve a sensitive side
So to star in silk scarves is sheer bliss.
I know I’m ungainly but please, tell me plainly,
Is my bill too big in this?
There’s a rumble in the jungle that the Dow Jones’ going to tumble
And the price of seeds and nuts is going to soar.
Which means, we’ll have to tweet to every parakeet
“Get stocking up, they’re flocking on the Floor”
Now, we’re in this caff, just ’avin’ a laff
(Me and another other giraffe)
When in comes this punter
Some posh big-game ‘unter
Next thing – we’re on this silk scarf.
‘Ee’s got some neck!
We’re yin and yan, we’re right and left
Through thick and thin, we’re warp and weft
Down all the ages, forever and ever
We’re perfect together
We’re there in our lair on the square
At the foot of Horatio’s column
Birds drop their poo on us, lads do the loo on us,
Some even screw on us
It’s hard to maintain our decorum